Dementia Toileting Tips For Caregivers

Dementia Toileting Tips For Caregivers




Someone with dementia is more likely to have accidents, problems with the toilet or incontinence than a person of the same age without dementia.

There are many reasons.



Causes of accidents and problems can include:


  • not being able to react quickly enough to the sensation of needing to use the toilet
  • failure to get to the toilet in time, sometimes due to mobility problems caused by other conditions such as arthritis


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  • inability to find, recognize, or use the toilet; if someone becomes confused about their surroundings, they may urinate in an inappropriate place (such as a wastepaper basket) because they have mistaken it for a toilet
  • not understanding a prompt from someone to use the toilet
  • not managing the personal activities of toileting, such as undoing clothing and personal hygiene
  • not letting others help with toileting – perhaps because of embarrassment or not understanding the offer of help
  • not making any attempt to find the toilet – this could be due to lack of motivation or depression, or because the person is distracted
  • embarrassment after an accident, which the person unsuccessfully tries to deal with. Wet or soiled clothes or feces may be put out of sight (for example, wrapped up and put at the back of a drawer) to be dealt with later, but then forgotten.
  • In some people incontinence develops because the nerve pathways that tell the brain that the bladder or bowel is full, and also control emptying, are damaged. However, this is an uncommon cause of toilet problems and incontinence in people with dementia. It typically occurs only when dementia is more advanced.



Tips for Caregivers: The Importance of a Healthy Bladder and Bowels


Keeping the urinary tract and bowels healthy is a good first step to preventing toilet problems and incontinence.


It can be helpful if caregivers can work with the person with dementia to ensure the following:


  • The person should drink six to eight glasses of fluids each day – more if they have hard stools. Cutting down fluids or not drinking them for long periods of time (for example to avoid the need to urinate at night) can cause urinary tract infections and constipation.


  • They should eat a balanced diet with at least five daily portions of fruit and vegetables, and enough fiber to ensure a regular bowel movement.


  • The person should keep as mobile as they can. If they are able, walking every day helps with bowel movements.


  • Ensure a regular time, and allow enough time on the toilet, to empty bowels. There are biological reasons why trying to go a few minutes after a meal works – many people favor going after breakfast.


  • If a health professional has suggested the person might have an overactive bladder, they will also advise replacing drinks which irritate the bladder (eg tea, coffee, cola or alcohol) with water, herbal teas, squash and fruit drinks.


  • Women with mild dementia and urinary stress incontinence sometimes learn pelvic floor exercises, with the support of specialist continence nurses or physiotherapists. These exercises can cure stress incontinence caused by weakness of the pelvic floor muscles due to childbirth or aging.




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Laxatives are widely available over the counter for people with constipation. However, they should not be used for long without seeking advice from a GP or pharmacist, as the symptoms may mask another condition. 


Suggestion:  Equate Fiber Powder – Clear, Soluble (this product isn’t fancy, but it’s effective and gentle, as well as inexpensive).


If constipation is the cause of fecal incontinence, caregivers can learn to massage the person’s abdomen to relieve the blockage. Specialist continence nurses can train carers in this technique, though it requires co-operation and is not to everyone’s liking.




Tips for Caregivers: Helping to Reduce Accidents



Help with using the toilet at home


The following ideas may help someone to find, recognize and use the toilet more easily:


  • Help the person identify where the toilet is. A sign on the door, including both words and a picture, may help. It will need to be clearly visible, so place it within the person’s line of vision and make sure the sign is bright so it’s easy to see. Help the person know when the toilet is vacant; leaving the toilet door open when not in use makes this obvious. Check the placement of mirrors in the bathroom. The person with dementia may confuse their reflection for someone else already in the room, and not go because they believe the toilet is occupied.


  • Help the person make their way easily to the toilet. Move any awkwardly placed furniture or prop ajar any doors that are hard to open. The room and the route to the toilet should be well lit, especially at night. Movement sensor lights in the bedroom and bathroom can help at night.


These decorative night lights are great for added safety in your bedroom, bathroom or hallway; they detect motion up to 25 feet within a 100-degree-wide zone, and will auto shut-off after 90 seconds.  Their light sensor prevents the light from turning off during daylight hours or when you have the lights turned on.



  • Make using the toilet easier for people with mobility problems. Aids such as handrails and a raised toilet seat may help. Occupational therapists can give free advice on these, or you can ask someone at a local independent living shop.


For more help, see


  • Help the person identify and use the toilet. A contrasting color (eg black seat on a white base) can make it easier to see. Some men who have poor mobility or balance, or who can no longer direct their penis when urinating, may find it easier to sit rather than stand.


  • Help the person undo, remove and replace clothing easily. Trousers with an elasticated waist (tracksuit bottoms) are often easier than zips. Some people find Velcro™ fastenings easier to use than zippers or buttons.


Shop for


  • If getting to the toilet becomes too difficult because of mobility problems, an aid such as a commode may be useful. Using this will require the person to recognize the commode, be willing to use it, and find it an acceptable piece of furniture.  commodes and other aids can be very helpful.
Drive Medical Folding Steel Bedside Commode, Grey


  • The person should have privacy in the toilet, but make sure they don’t have difficulty managing locks. Some people with dementia struggle with this. To avoid the person locking themselves in, disable locks or ensure you can open them quickly from the outside.




Out and About


There are several ways to make traveling or being outside easier for the person with dementia. Being more confident and able to cope with accidents is important, because toilet problems can lead to giving up activities or becoming isolated.


  • Plan in advance. Find out where accessible toilets are.


  • Go prepared. Fit a light pad (the kind that attaches to underwear) and carry spare clothing and pads, as well as a bag for soiled items.


For more help, see



Remembering to Use the Toilet


  • Giving regular reminders about using the toilet is a common approach to help with accidents. For someone with urinary incontinence, the caregiver asks regularly (every 2-4 hours) whether the person needs the toilet. The person is given encouragement and assistance with using the toilet if they ask for help. It is important to check that the person has used the toilet, and not forgotten or become distracted. There is evidence that, over time, this can help some people reduce the number of accidents.
  • Prompting needs to be done sensitively, to avoid patronizing or annoying the person with dementia. Watch discreetly for signs that the person wants to go to the toilet, even if they cannot communicate this directly. These signs may include fidgeting, pacing, getting up and down, or pulling at their clothes.



Scheduling Toilet Use


  • For someone who is regularly wet it may be better to develop a timetable to offer help or reminders for going to the toilet, for example when they wake up, before each meal, at morning and afternoon coffee or tea, and before bed.
  • For fecal incontinence, it is often possible to re-establish continence by going to the toilet at a set time each day and helping the person stay long enough to have a bowel movement.



Night Time


Many older people wake during the night to urinate. A person with dementia may wake disorientated and unable to act quickly enough to find (or get to) the toilet. Ideas that might help include:

Maxxima LED Automatic Night Lights With Dusk to Dawn Sensor


  • light motion sensors and/or night lights in the bedroom, passage ways and bathroom

As you can see, I am a big fan of night lights; these small, inexpensive items make a huge difference in your home’s safety!  

These automatic LED night lights are small, low-maintenance, and bright.  They will turn on automatically in low light and remain on until morning light.  This way, you “set it and forget it.” 

For more on lighting, see

Deluxe Male Urinal Glow in the Dark Lid




  • a urinal bottle (designed for men and women) or commode next to the bed at night.  Many people don’t realize these products exist, but they can be really helpful, especially for nighttime toileting.



Universal Portable Urinal Unisex
Unisex Urinal
  • not having drinks for two hours before going to bed, but remember that the person should still drink enough during the day to avoid becoming dehydrated.



For more help, see:




Dealing With an Accident


Hygiene is a very personal issue. From a young age, people are trained to control urges to go to the toilet, so having problems or being incontinent can make a person feel like they are losing control. This can affect their sense of dignity and self-esteem. Many people find it very hard to accept that they need help from someone else in such an intimate area of their life, even (or sometimes, especially) if the help is from someone very close to them.

Every individual will react differently to the experience of incontinence. Some people find it very upsetting, while others find it easier to accept. Approaching the problem with understanding, matter-of-factness and humor can help to improve the situation for all concerned.


If someone has an accident, it is important for carers and friends to:


  • remember that it’s not the person’s fault
  • try to overcome any embarrassment or distaste they may feel
  • avoid being angry or appearing upset.


This may not always be easy. If as a caregiver, you find feelings about incontinence difficult to handle, it is a good idea to talk things through with a health professional. This could be the GP, a community nurse or a continence adviser (a nurse with specialist training in management of incontinence). It is important to try not to let dealing with incontinence get in the way of your relationship with the person you are caring for.



For more help, see



Ensuring Good Personal Hygiene


Incontinence can lead to skin irritation and a general feeling of discomfort. After an accident, it is important to act quickly to make sure the person feels comfortable again and to ensure good hygiene.


  • If someone has become wet or soiled, they should wash afterwards with mild soap and warm water, and dry carefully before putting on clean clothes and fresh pads, with assistance if necessary.


  • Soiled clothes, reusable pads or bedding should be washed immediately, or soaked in an airtight container until they are washed.


  • Used pads should be stored in an appropriate container and disposed of as soon as possible.


  • Moist toilet tissues may be suitable for minor accidents, but be aware that some can cause an irritating rash.



Professional Support


It can be hard to seek professional help for incontinence. Many people do so only at a point of crisis, as it may feel like a loss of dignity for the person with dementia. Some may see incontinence as inevitable, but for many people with dementia, given the right advice and patience, accidents and incontinence can be managed or sometimes even cured

The GP should be the first port of call. The doctor should review the symptoms and any underlying medical conditions (urinary tract infection or constipation), diet or medications that might be causing the problems. The doctor may do an internal examination of the bowel.

If this assessment is unable to resolve things, ask to have the person referred to a continence adviser. You may have to be persistent here you may have to push to see someone who understands incontinence in people with dementia. There may be a wait for these services.

The continence adviser will assess the problems and how they are affecting quality of life for the person and any carer. It is common to be asked to keep a chart of toilet habits.

After a thorough assessment the continence adviser will write up a continence care plan tailored to the individual. The plan should include things that the person with dementia and any caregiver can do to help. It should also describe the support that professionals should provide, as well as follow-up and next steps.

The goal – agreed with the person with dementia and carer – should be to cure toilet problems or incontinence wherever possible. In many cases, identifying and addressing practical issues, changing medications or making simple changes to lifestyle (diet, fluids, exercise) are sufficient to achieve this.

In a few cases referral to further specialists such as a geriatrician or urologist will be needed. For some people, advice will focus not on cure but on containing the incontinence as comfortably as possible using aids.



Incontinence Aids


It may be that everything has been tried and toilet problems and incontinence persist. In this case, use of aids can help ensure greater comfort and protect clothing, furniture and bedding. The main aids are:

  • Incontinence pads and pull-up pants. These can be worn day and night, or during the night only, to draw fluids away from the skin. It is important to find the right type and absorbency for the individual: they should be comfortable without chafing or leaking. They should be changed as often as necessary.
  • Male continence sheath. This is a silicone condom which drains into a bag attached to the leg. It may be especially helpful when worn at night.
  • Waterproof mattress protector. This is often used in combination with an absorbent bed pad. The protector should not come into contact with the skin, as it may cause chafing and soreness. You can also buy special protective duvet covers and pillowcases.
GoodNites Disposable Bed Mats



For more help, see:



Thanks for visiting and reading … I hope this article provided you some helpful ideas.  I welcome your comments below.




Incontinence Care Products at Northshore Care!



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